Suppressed Grief
By Janice S Ramkissoon
12th May 2011
 

“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind” (2nd Timothy 1:7, KJV).

My experience of the various unprocessed grief in my life (from childhood to adult pain) became ‘a thorn in my flesh’. Some of these losses included: The death of loved ones; Our miscarriages; My loss of employment and financial independence; The loss of friends and community support, through relocation (including schooling and places of fellowship) and also through misunderstanding. Facing the struggles of adult life with all that unprocessed grief added to the fact that I was also grieving the loss of my childhood was disaster waiting to happen.

Disaster struck and I traveled a lonely path for a very long while. It affected my spiritual and emotional maturity, finding me being ineffective in my various ministries. I held on to 2nd Timothy 1:7 to keep me from falling or to help me stand again when I get weak. Today I am here to report victory so that those who have wept with me can now rejoice with me according to Romans 12:15, for truly my morning has arrived.

Today I am testifying of the power of God’s love because He has put the broken pieces back together again. I am in the ‘Potter’s House’ being polished and shined and I can see beauty on the horizon. I love the Lord and I am happy to be in the Love zone where there are angels all around me. I thank God for His love that gave me strength and enabled me to endure. I thank Him for the wisdom He has bestowed upon my husband who now walks with me, lightening the weight, as the Holy Spirit continues to teach us. As we continue to grow in the knowledge and wisdom of Christ, I pray that our lives will be living examples of Christ’s unconditional love. I thank God for the prayer warriors He placed in my life, spending time on their knees for me.

If this is your first exposure to my writing, welcome to the love zone. May you be encouraged as you read the articles that I have been inspired to write. I believe I went through my tunnel experiences for a purpose greater than I can comprehend. Therefore, I am asking God for wisdom as I use my writing to edify others, in relating the many lessons I continue to learn on this journey. May it encourage you to remain faithful to God, following his instructions in full submission to His will, for the bible says, ‘Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love Him’ (James 1:12).

To all my fellow believers: Don’t get weary in doing good. Keep serving from a pure heart and watch God at work in your life, while giving Him His due praise. Let your light shine so that others may see your good works and come to glorify your Father in heaven. It is easy to get discouraged and I know that feeling very well, but I often have to remind myself as I am reminding you today that Jesus was rejected by His very own so I can’t expect any different. Therefore, I am encouraging you to press on my brothers and sisters. Expect the darts to come. They will not stop simply because you are now fully trusting God, this may be the very ingredient for them to multiply. They will only come in different form and through different individuals but as long as you remain in His will and allow Him to lead the way, with your full armor on, the darts will bounce off, and your faith will increase.

Rest and allow for physical, emotional and spiritual renewal but do not quit! Rest is a command from your heavenly Father. Rest allows for physical, emotional, mental and spiritual renewal. So don’t quit! Refuse to give the enemy anymore power in your life. God will never give up on you, even when you cannot feel Him near. He promised never to leave you nor forsake you. This is an unconditional promise. It means that He is always with you. So put on your armor in its entirety, according to Ephesians 6 and get ready for battle (pray, fast, praise). It’s a spiritual warfare, “For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places” (Ephesians 6:12).

Your praise is a garment you wear continually; do not take it for granted for there is power in praise because there is power in Jesus’ name. Through praise, you are building your spiritual muscles so praise Him through your circumstances. Whatever season you are in today keep praising. It is one of the many gifts given to us when we receive Christ into our lives. In praising God, we are in worship mode. We were created to worship Him. Praise replaces the spirit of heaviness.

The spirit of heaviness is a tool of the enemy to distract us from seeing the many blessings in our lives; having us focus on all that is going wrong or all the unanswered prayers, instead of focusing on our blessings that allows us to keep praise alive. When that happens we allow the enemy control of our minds, forgetting the power within us is stronger than any force of evil. That overwhelming fear then cripples us and causes us to take our eyes off Christ. At this point, the enemy strikes and like Peter, in Matthew 14:22-33, when he took his eyes off Christ, we begin to sink. It is a gradual process and sometimes we do not even recognize that we are sinking.

Praise Him continually and watch Him at work in your life, working it all out for you. While you are praising, the windows of heaven will open and your blessings will begin to flow.

Count your blessings, one by one, and you’ll be surprised of the many things and people you have taken for granted. Start to make that list today and it will ignite the praise in you.

God bless you on your journey. I pray that you will feel His loving arms wrapped around you as I continue to share my journey of grieving and healing with you.

Your sister in Christ
Janice S Ramkissoon
12th May 2011.

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